I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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