I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Randomize
