Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
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