you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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