I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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