Texts From Last Night

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  (778): View more from British Columbia

  i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?

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  (778): i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea? http://tfl.nu/q7z7
  Replies (44) Good night (3783) Bad night (779)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.

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  (703): Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid. http://tfl.nu/xyt3
  Replies (37) Good night (7145) Bad night (785)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"

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  (773): you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE" http://tfl.nu/hmmg
  Replies (17) Good night (6352) Bad night (1019)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!

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  (812): I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah! http://tfl.nu/iijo
  Replies (13) Good night (2619) Bad night (751)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal

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  (503): Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal http://tfl.nu/qwe2
  Replies (13) Good night (7325) Bad night (1487)
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  (408): View more from California

  You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.

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  (408): You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree. http://tfl.nu/igom
  Replies (1) Good night (2204) Bad night (870)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.

  (270): View more from Kentucky

  No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.

  (618): View more from Illinois

  Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.

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  (618): Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you. (270): No, that's okay. Don't worry about it. (618): Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway. http://tfl.nu/gcov
  Replies (45) Good night (3578) Bad night (1259)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.

  (360): View more from Washington

  It was me.

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  (360): Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who. (360): It was me. http://tfl.nu/kgk9
  Replies (3) Good night (2658) Bad night (465)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.

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  (914): I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have. http://tfl.nu/s46w
  Replies (5) Good night (742) Bad night (359)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.

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  (202): His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together. http://tfl.nu/je6r
  Replies (8) Good night (1407) Bad night (636)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.

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  (206): He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years. http://tfl.nu/o48r
  Replies (6) Good night (352) Bad night (1014)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.

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  (407): We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party. http://tfl.nu/zy10
  Replies (3) Good night (714) Bad night (219)
• Favorite

  (240): View more from Maryland

  You said dick pics aren't attractive

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3

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  (240): You said dick pics aren't attractive (301): Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3 http://tfl.nu/0mk5
  Replies (4) Good night (1018) Bad night (276)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.

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  (503): In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win. http://tfl.nu/mc4e
  Replies (11) Good night (627) Bad night (352)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.

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  (425): So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy. http://tfl.nu/7bpm
  Replies (2) Good night (519) Bad night (304)

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