ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
