ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize