after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
