some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Randomize
