I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
