Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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