Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
