Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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