Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
