How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize
