I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Randomize
