didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
the room spins SO much faster in panama
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
