I'm really into asian looking animals
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
No subtext here. People are naked.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize