It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Randomize
