I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
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