walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
