Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
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