I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
My dick has a subreddit
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I look excited, but its just a facade.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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