So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Just pee around me
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Randomize
