am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Randomize
