just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Randomize
