I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize