yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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