Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
I fill condoms, not promises.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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