dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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