The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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