your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I have feelings that need drinking.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
