butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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