oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Randomize
