So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
