Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
