its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize
