He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
