You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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