im drinking this country out of the recession.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Randomize