After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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