There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
