We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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