I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
