Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
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