If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
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Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
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