I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
