i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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