for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
